Are You Happy?

Are you happy?

What determines your happiness? Are you happy because you are married, have beautiful children, have a great career, or are you financially secure? Do these things or others determine happiness for you? I thought I was happy until my husband died. I realized I was happy being a wife, being spoiled by him, and having nice things. It was normal for me to be sad after losing my best friend, lover, child's father, and husband. In my grief and journey of healing, I realized that I was never happy with myself. Nothing was ever good enough for me. I thought back when I was married, how I would complain more than appreciate the things my late husband would do for me. I was extremely judgmental. The more judgmental I was towards others, the better l thought I was. However, after a while, I realized that deep down, I disliked myself. There were things that happened in my life, and in my childhood in particular, that affected my happiness. When I started working on myself, I no longer had time to dwell on the past or be judgmental to others. I had a lot of work to do, and I am still a work in progress. I am more understanding and compassionate towards others than I was before. I remember waking up one day feeling like I had just won the lottery. I finally knew what happiness was! I had looked in the mirror at all of my flaws and had a big smile! WHY? At that moment, I realized I was beautiful and smart. Yes, I can afford to lose a few pounds. My skin isn't flawless.... but I'm happy with me! Those things that I can change, I work on; those things that I can not work on, I give them to God.

I now look at people and things differently. When I see someone who appears to be down or depressed, I realize that they may be suffering or going through a terrible situation in their life. What I do now is try to make that person smile! If you can't help them or bring a smile to their face, why are you judging them? You would be amazed how a compliment can change a person's day for the better. A simple "Hello" and a smile can really brighten their day. You should bring joy to people, not misery. Remember to surround yourself with positive people.

Tips to Help You Be Happy:

 Mine your own business
 Compliment others
 Improve yourself on a daily basis
 Exercise and take care of your health
 Surround yourself with positive people
 Set and accomplished goals

When you mind your own business, you will remove unnecessary stress out of your life. It is so easy to pay attention to other people's business and avoid dealing with your own. When you improve yourself on a daily basis, you will not have time to focus on what others have going on with their lives. Remember, negative people will bring you down, make you upset, and hold you back from growing and succeeding in your own life. Positive people will encourage you to do better and be better. They will make you feel loved and encourage you to love yourself.

Widows of Opportunity's founder Kimberly Richardson at
www.widowsofopportunity.com or 803-238-5301.